[step:Subtract the Tonelli equalities and conclude]
For $\mu$-a.e. $x \in X$ (specifically, for $x \in X \setminus N$), the section $f_x \in L^1(Y, \nu)$, and
\begin{align*}
\int_Y f(x, y)\, d\nu(y) = \int_Y f^+(x, y)\, d\nu(y) - \int_Y f^-(x, y)\, d\nu(y) = \varphi^+(x) - \varphi^-(x).
\end{align*}
Define $\varphi : X \to \mathbb{R}$ by $\varphi(x) = \varphi^+(x) - \varphi^-(x)$ for $x \in X \setminus N$ (and set $\varphi(x) = 0$ on $N$, say). Since $\varphi^+, \varphi^- \in L^1(X, \mu)$ (both have finite integrals, as shown above), the difference $\varphi = \varphi^+ - \varphi^- \in L^1(X, \mu)$. This establishes conclusion (3): the function $x \mapsto \int_Y f(x,y)\, d\nu(y)$ belongs to $L^1(X, \mu)$.
Integrating $\varphi$ over $X$ and using the Tonelli equalities:
\begin{align*}
\int_X \left(\int_Y f(x, y)\, d\nu(y)\right) d\mu(x) &= \int_X \varphi^+(x)\, d\mu(x) - \int_X \varphi^-(x)\, d\mu(x) \\
&= \int_{X \times Y} f^+\, d(\mu \otimes \nu) - \int_{X \times Y} f^-\, d(\mu \otimes \nu) \\
&= \int_{X \times Y} (f^+ - f^-)\, d(\mu \otimes \nu) = \int_{X \times Y} f\, d(\mu \otimes \nu).
\end{align*}
The subtraction of the two integrals is justified because both are finite. By symmetry, the same argument with $X$ and $Y$ interchanged gives
\begin{align*}
\int_Y \left(\int_X f(x, y)\, d\mu(x)\right) d\nu(y) = \int_{X \times Y} f\, d(\mu \otimes \nu),
\end{align*}
establishing conclusion (4) and (5).
[/step]